A New Leaf

Today is the last day of June, so what better to talk about than the past and the future? Does that make sense to anyone but me? Well, either way - tomorrow is a big day for me.

Tomorrow I begin a new diet/exercise/Bible study plan. After my little Emergency Room scare last week, I have decided that I need to stop being so lackadaisical about my health, and I'm attacking it from a few directions.

First - Bible study - I'm going to kick my self in the spiritual butt. Although my relationship with God is always changing, I'm going to do what I can to keep growing. So I'm going to start reading the Bible more, and I'm excited to get going. Not quite sure where I'm going to begin yet though. Recommendations are welcome!

Secondly, food. Oh, how I love good food. This means a lot of different things for me. Sometimes it means I love roasted vegetables and a fish fillet. Other times it means I love cheeseburgers and fried mushrooms. Not always great choices...BUT, tomorrow I will start making wise food decisions and not just tasty food decisions. A good friend who is very health-informed is going to help me talk through some of this and help me figure out what I need to eat to lower my cholesterol (which, at a high, was a whopping 304! - if you don't know what that means, check out this fact sheet) and get into great shape.

And speaking of great shape - here comes the exercise. I am the type of person who despises exercise. I'd rather curl up on the couch with an old movie or ride around in a car (that has air conditioning, of course). I'm just not big on strenous activity. Hence my ridiculous state of health currently. So, that's on my list of things to change. I'm starting off slowly because I'm just flat-out out of shape.

Today is the last day of my unhealthyness! I'll try to keep you posted on the journey. And hopefully I'll be able to have some before and after pics.

Fiesta

In the 4 years that Dave and I have been married, we've gone the last two and a half without a kitchen table. We do a lot of coffee table dinners. When we went home for vacation last month, we were able to pick up our table and bring it to the new house! I was thrilled, and decided to celebrate with a big Mexican fiesta - all homemade!

The menu:

Fish Tacos

Guacamole

Mango Salsa

Cilantro Lime Rice

and a Key-Limeish dessert thing (only kind of homemade, because I improvised with the recipe on the box)

Here's the recipe for my guacamole:

3 avocados

1 tbsp of minced garlic (I love garlic, so I use quite a bit)

about 2 tsp of cilantro (this is for dried, use less if your cilantro is fresh)

about a tsp each of garlic salt and onion powder

salt and pepper to taste

a sprinkle of cayenne pepper

zest and juice of one lime

Mix it all up and enjoy! You can also add chopped tomatoes and onions, if you like that kind of thing - but I prefer it without.

Twenty-three, so far

Monday, I turned 23.  Since Monday morning, I've done the following:

• been to the chiropractor - about whose unfathomable power I am waning in passion, I must add
• had a very, very wonderful birthday party with some very, very wonderful friends
• lost power at my house, during said birthday party, for about 2 hours
• been to Louisville and back for a convention through work
• had a false alarm heart attack, as I've been calling it
• and a subsequent trip to the Emergency Room to get an EKG, a chest x-ray, a sonogram to check for gall stones, and ended up with a non-diagnosis          
  
• researched esophageal spasms (which the ER thinks is the likely cause of my chest pain), gastroesophageal reflux disorder, acid reflux disorder, panic attacks, panic disorder, and depression
• called my family practice doctor to schedule a hopefully-more-productive-than-the-ER appointment
• bought a food processor with birthday money
• had an emotional breakdown
• got over it
• broke the A/C in my car
• ate 3 cups of jello and 3 slices of key lime pie (don't judge me... it was a false alarm heart attack)
• took a five and a half hour nap
• blogged

what have you done in the past 4 days?

Texture, Patterns, and Color

I don't have anything insightful to say today. The wind and storms have just kicked in around downtown Nashville, so the sky is dark and things are pretty quiet. It's just a normal day at work - my stack of things to do is pretty minimal, I can hear the chatter of those who cannot live without speaker phone, the elevator dinging every 2 minutes, and the squeak of too old office chairs. So, what am I doing with my time? Besides taking the phone calls coming in and out - I am making outfits based on room decor. "What?", you may ask. Well...here is an example.

This room is from the Design*Sponge website. So moody, so feminine, so sleek. Anyway...after cleaning up my drool, I made an outfit on Polyvore to mimic the fun vibe from the room. The gorgeous light fixture above the window bench inspired the necklace, the dark gray-teal of the walls inspired the shoes, etc. If you've ever seen the show "Dress My Nest" on the style network, it's kind of the same thing - but backwards. I think I have many more of these up my sleeve. But maybe not on days that I'm supposed to be working.

Vacation!

We are officially back from our summer vacation/family reunion. It was a wonderful time. Really - really wonderful. Dave's brother and his family have been in the Philippines for nearly 4 years, and they were able to come back home for a while. It was so great to catch up with all of them, and see all of our neices and nephews together for the first time.

We were sad to leave the family again, but we hope to see them several more times before they head back overseas next January. Here are a few pictures from vacation.

This picture of Dave and me was taken at a water show in Branson, MO...which is just really amazing fountains with lights and fire and stuff. Pretty neat, I thought.

The resort where we stayed had some really amazing outdoor activities. Paddle boating was definitely something the kiddos wanted to try.

This is the whole Hagen gang.

It was so great to get to see our neices and nephews again. Starting on the top left and going clockwise, these cuties are Zach, Mikayla, Ben (all three Dave's brother's kids), Sydney, and Abby (Dave's sister's girls).

The resort was beautiful. Lots of beautiful landscaping.

This was our last day at the resort. We had a blast with the Hagens.

Shameless

I have briefly blogged about my new craft room in the house we just moved into. It is a wonderful place filled with cubbies and sorting tins and the cutest little push pins. Do you know what it's missing? This craft table.

I firmly believe that buying this table for my craft area would be a waste of money. But, I also firmly believe that if i won this table, my room would be a magical place. If you feel the same way, pretty please vote for my window at this link. http://theoriginalscrapbox.com/craftbox_giveaway/showContestant.php?id=342 Shameless, yes, desperate, yes, but just look at that table! Sigh.

We Found Our Winner

The number generated on random.org is 7! So that means that Laura is the winner!

Hey Steph!I think this is a fantastic idea! I'd leave the creating up to you. :)Laura Nelson
May 16, 2009 9:44 PM

Congratulations Laura! You and I have already discussed some custom artwork, so you can be expecting your creation soon!

I love to give gifts, so stay tuned to the blog for more giveaways in the future. Thanks to everyone who participated.

A Small Giveaway

There are several blogs that I consistently follow. They sometimes decide to do giveaways, and as soon as I see that - I get VERY excited.

So, I am passing that excitement along to you in honor of the upcoming weekend! I will be giving away something based on the person who wins the drawing - and I'm going to try to make something specifically for the winner. To be entered in the drawing, just leave a comment on this post...and if you have a preference to the type of thing you'd like, or something that you want incorporated into what you win, if you win, put that in the comment!

The winner will be posted on Monday sometime.

Moved In

So, things have been nuts this week. Between appointments with the chiropractor (who is doing amazing work, I must say), cleaning out the apartment, and sticking boxes in the new house, I have been working hard (which the chiropractor is not happy about).

Because it is Friday after lunch and the forecast is ridiculous this weekend (rain, rain, rain, rain, thunderstorms, rain) all I can think about is finally getting things put away in the new house. Right now we have boxes and piles. I'm looking forward to hanging up some art, settling in among new pillows, and reorganizing my very own craft room that does not have to share space with Dave's very own recording studio. Cables and "gear" do not match the coziness I'm going for.

In the whirlwind of packing and unpacking I found our digital camera! It is very much still broken, but I think with the natural light that our new house gets (yay for windows on both sides of the house!) I may be able to snap a few shots of the "finished corners" of the house.

On a side note - things I have planned for the next couple weeks of blogging...
- an arts and crafts giveaway!
- my first venture into gardening (if it ever stops raining)
- hopefully some vacation pics at the end of the month...hooray for May!

Happy weekend friends!

You Can't Spell Heart without Art - part II

For the second installment of the current "series" of blog posts, I'd love to explain the inspiration behind the first painted window I did - titled "hope". Here's a picture of the piece.

One of my favorite singer/songwriters (a genre I have much love for) is Sara Groves. I have posted about her too many times...but one of my favorite songs of hers is about hope. Last year, I went through a really rough few months struggling with depression and hopelessness. I heard this song for the first time as I was coming away from that season. I was inspired by her lyrics and the song itself.

Although I am not a musician, I have always had a passion for music. Emotions for me are really intertwined with music, so after hearing this song, I decided to literally have a hope window. Looking at it always reminds me of the song and how "hope has a way of turning its face to you, just when you least expect it."

Here are the lyrics to the song, and I urge you to check out the link, which also has the lyrics, but will let you listen to a piece of the song.

http://www.saragroves.com/store/tellmewhatyouknow/lyrics/itmightbehope/

You do your work the best that you can
you put one foot in front of the other
life comes in waves and makes its demands
you hold on as well as you're able

You've been here for a long long time
Hope has a way of turning its face to you
just when you least expect it
you walk in a room you look out a window
and something there leaves you breathless
you say to yourself it's been a while since I felt this
but it feels like it might be hope

It's hard to recall what blew out the flame
it's been dark since you can remember
you talk it all through to find it a name
as days go on by without number

You've been here for a long long time
Hope has a way of turning its face to you
just when you least expect it
you walk in a room you look out a window
and something there leaves you breathless
you say to yourself it's been a while since I felt this
but it feels like it might be hope

You can't spell heart without art - part 1

Warning! This is going to be a long post. As the first "installment" of the series I decided to title "You can't spell heart without art", I chose my favorite pieces. Because they are my favorites, I have put the most thought and heart into them, and thus - I have a lot to say about them.

Because my artwork has always been such a personal thing for me, a few pieces come out a little extra personal. Some of which I plan to never show the world. Ever. Others though, are very personal and still manage to eek out into public somehow. This set of 5 paintings is the latter. They are currently untitled because I'm not quite sure how to sum up all the emotion and love that went into these with just a word or two. Here they are all together.


The paintings are done on the pages of an old storybook, and are attached to old barn wood. The book pages are not necessarily significant, but the barn wood is. I wanted something damaged, beat-up, and dirty. I think it's important for people to know that beauty comes from despair. It's a lesson I have learned, and I'm sure will continue to learn. So, to turn old barn wood covered in mud into a piece of art was a way I felt I could represent that.

Each painting was inspired by one of my favorite verses from the Bible. Verses that mean a lot to me in different ways.

"gaze upon the beauty" is based on Psalm 27:4, which is "One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple."

Quite a bit of my dependence on God was taught to me through my dependence on people that couldn’t handle my dependence. They were not created to fill every need in my life. I know that now, and I continue to learn from those relationships. In the midst of learning those lessons, I often find myself crying out to God just asking for stability, comfort, or strength.

If I could ask the Lord for anything, just one thing, I’m not sure I would know what to pick. This verse says, “One thing I ask of the Lord,” and that astounds me. Not only does the writer choose just one thing to ask of the Lord - who holds all in His hand - but his one request is to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord. Just sitting at the feet of God, in His temple, in His time – gazing upon the beauty before him. With all my brokenness and selfishness, I pray that I will one day grasp that the one thing I need in my life more than stability or strength is to seek Him in His temple.

"sour on wings like eagles" is based on the verse Isaiah 40:31. “But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”

This verse is one of my favorites for several reasons. I get tired pretty quickly when it comes to most things. Whether it’s my future plans, my job, or my growth in relationships – I get tired of the waiting. I catch myself thinking that I’m stuck and I get so tired of being stuck. Isaiah tells me otherwise. This verse tells me that I am not stuck; I am soaring on wings that the Lord gives me through hope. If I can keep my eyes hoping in the Lord, I will not grow weary, I will not be faint, I will soar on wings like eagles.

"I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God."
Ephesians 3:17-19

That verse really hits me. A love that surpasses knowledge. A love that can fill me with the measure of all the fullness of God. A love that is so amazing I have to have the power of all the saints to understand it. And that’s the love that He’s giving away. No effort on my part, no amount of studying, no natural ability will bring me any closer to understanding why God loves me the way He does. But He loves me in such a powerful way. His love is wide. His love is long. It is high, and it is deep.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile."
Jeremiah 29: 11-14

One of the things I find about myself to be a stumbling block is my constant wandering, as I affectionately call it. I am always looking for a better situation, the next step, or the newest accomplishment. I have a hard time being content where I am. I always think that if I could just do this thing, then life would be better.

What I love about this verse, specifically, is the phrase, “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you.” I am a wanderer at heart and whatever it is that I’m constantly looking for – all the man-made splendor of society – is rubbish compared to what I truly should be seeking. So, instead of seeking the world with a half-hearted effort, God tells me to seek Him. With all my heart. And there, I will be content.

This painting, "from the fullness of His grace" is based on the verse John 1:16. I have blogged about my love of this verse before - and that is actually what inspired me to do this set of paintings. Here is the link to the post talking about this verse and its significance to me.


Well...that is the first installment of "You can't spell heart without art". Stay tuned for more. I'll give you a few days to read part one, since it's so dadgum long.

Inspiration and Validation

Express was amazing. Thanks so much to all of you for supporting me in my venture into public creativity. It was a definite challenge, but I pulled through as a better person, I think. Taking what is normally such a personal thing for me and putting it literally on display for hundreds of people to see was no small thing. All of your words of encouragement and prayers have not gone unnoticed. So...thanks!

The festival was finished around 4:30 on Sunday afternoon, and I had such a sense of calm after it was all over. I felt inspired by the number of artists coming together over the act of worshipping through art, I felt validated in a strange way, and I had some really amazing bonding time with people I had never met before as we discussed my most personal artwork. I hope to be involved next year as well - and I will have (hopefully) grown a lot as a person and as an artist.

Here are a few pictures from Sunday. In the next few days I'll post a few pictures of specific artwork from my booth as well as some detail about how each piece is an act of worship to the true Creator.

Here's Amanda (who was kind enough to let me use her camera!) checking out my booth.

Although Dave was having a little fun playing with the settings on the camera, this was the best photo we got of the hallway where the artist booths were set up.

Here I am in with the artwork. Not pictured, the amazing boots I borrowed to wear Sunday.

Where did April go?

Well - for heaven's sake, we're halfway through April and I am just now posting the first blog of the month. Does this point to a lack of focus? Surely not.

Though I have slacked on my duties to the blog, I have been quite focused and motivated to get some artwork done in time for the Art Festival this weekend (eep!). So things have been a little hectic around the apartment... and my car... and work. Not to mention getting ready to move (which has only been mentally hectic, no physical actions have been taken as of yet) and some surprise back pain which made nearly all physical activity impossible. That was fun. (Turns out I have scoliosis, with a couple vertebrae trying to twist around backwards that must have pinched a nerve cluster or something…very exciting stuff.) I did get a lot of time to read, though. And I even tried painting from the lying down position - like my good friend, Michelangelo. He must have had much larger biceps than I. My arms were getting very tired after the second canvas. But, all that lying down time did help my creative juices, surprisingly, and I’ve done some artwork that I’m pretty proud of this week. Since I currently do not have a digital camera, I can’t post any pictures of the newest pieces. Maybe I can find a friend with a nice camera to get some fun pictures of my work and the art festival this weekend and I’ll hopefully be able to post about that next week.

Now that I’m back on my feet (literally) I have a feeling that in the next few days things are going to get very artsy around here.

Movin' Up

This has been a great week of change and excitement. First of all - I heard back about the Express Arts Festival (which I blogged about a few posts back) and I have been accepted into the artists list! I am thrilled and nervous - but mostly thrilled. The artwork will be displayed from Easter weekend through the 20th, which means lots of eyes taking it all in as they meander about the church campus. This will be my first actual art show apart from high school "art shows" where everyone puts their work out on the tables for the parents to coo over. So, am I excited? Why, yes, I am.

The second wave of excitement is for Dave, who is really doing a knock-out job at work lately. He's been working a ton of hours every week (100+ in some cases), which can get really tiring, I'm sure you can imagine. But the great thing is that he's really making some headway with his contacts. He's getting asked to do a lot of great projects and getting involved.

And lastly - wahoo! - we're moving into this precious little house! We'll move in towards the end of April, out of our little apartment and into a real house. One of the best things about this house, apart from the oh-so-cute shutters and having two bathrooms - is that it is right across the street from some of the best friends we have ever had. I hope they are prepared to be seeing a lot of us.

Cha- Cha- Change

Today is the first day of spring, for those of you who were not aware. So throw off your winter cocoon and go play in the sun. My plans for the weekend are:
1. Laundry…it is crucial to my sanity that I have clean clothes again.
2. Go to the park and paint outside with two very sweet people.
3. Check out a duplex in Franklin (Franklin, TN is one of the best towns in America. If you don’t know about Franklin, Google it.)

That’s right, we are thinking about heading to the outskirts of Nashville. The apartment complex in which we currently live is raising our rent again, and for the same price we could live in the cutest little downtown in Tennessee. I am fairly certain that I’m part gypsy and so my soul prefers to wander. One of the symptoms of wandering is my love for change. Changing my hairstyle, the set-up of the living room, my clothes at least three times a day (which my mom tells me started at a very young age), and to bigger things as well – such as changing where I live. I think I would be happy bouncing from house to house for the rest of my life.

When my brother, my sisters, and I were younger we moved around quite a bit. We went through an entire year of constant moving, actually. (Eight houses total that year) My parents were not as excited about the adventure as the four of us kids were, but we really had a blast. I think that has somewhat molded me for life, and I still crave the adventure that living in a new place brings. Although that wandering soul might change as I get older and become comforted by routine, I’m also certain that while I am living in this place, on this finite earth, I will not be truly at home.

Express

Our church has an arts festival every year called “Express”. Artists, musicians, and writers can all be involved, and it’s a great way to meet new people in the church. This year, since this is the year of “putting myself out there”, I submitted a request to be one of the artists at the festival. I have to get my artwork checked out by the team of people reviewing the submissions and then create like crazy in the next few weeks to have enough stuff to fill my booth if I’m selected. I’m really excited about the idea; I’m just beginning to get confidence in what I’m doing and I can’t wait to test it all out on a live audience. Here is the most recent painting I did. It's a mini-set of 9. Each canvas is 4"x 5". I think I'm going to use this as one of the samples I bring in to the church to be reviewed. I’d love to hear feedback from all of you, as well. Any favorites of mine that you think I should bring in? Any comments are helpful and welcome!

I'm a Real Artist!

I have sold my first painting! I ended up losing 6 cents on it, but who's counting? (Shipping and packaging is apparently a total racket!) While "talking up" my sale yesterday, I was able to hand out a few business cards as well - which resulted in selling two more paintings! These two will be custom, so I'm pretty excited about that. I don’t quite feel like a fake when I say that I’m an artist now…which is also pretty exciting.

Although art has always been a hobby of mine, I kind of lost all desire to paint and create for a couple years (coincidentally…or perhaps not so coincidentally… the two years that I was an art and design major in college) and I’m feeling such a relief now that that part of my life is back. Creative outlets are so therapeutic for me. I can just sit and turn my brain off while I’m painting or drawing and ignore life outside my apartment for awhile. Not to say life isn’t worth paying attention to, but sometimes it’s best to get away from it for a bit.

Gatlinburg

We had a great weekend spending some quality time with friends. The weather was rainy all day Saturday, and snowy Sunday, so we didn't partake in many outdoor activities. We did however, get to play games, tell stories, and sit in the hot tub. We had some really great bonding time in the car ride with the 7 of us (6 adults and one kiddo) packed into one vehicle.

More blogging in the next couple of days. Work has been busy and the computer at home is fried...so my blogging time is limited.

Good Food, Good Friends

I am, by design, a social person. I could go months with no alone time and love it. Growing up in a family of 6, you learn to enjoy the quiet togetherness without needing quietness alone. Though I am learning- sometimes slower than I like- that it is important and rewarding to spend some quiet time thinking and processing, I still love to be surrounded by friends and family. The past few days have been a wonderfully social couple of days. I've gotten to spend quality time with my closest friends down in Nashville, and the rest of the week is just as cozy! Six of us are headed to Gatlinburg, TN (which is a tourist spot in the Smokies, for those of you not familiar with it) for the weekend; I could not be more excited. I will try to take some great pictures while we are there and document the fun for everyone when I return.

The planning for the little trip has got me thinking a lot about the importance of close friends. Before coming to Tennessee, my family were the closest friends I had. They are still the best friends I will ever have and my life would not be complete without them. Moving eight hours away can sometimes change the dynamics of a relationship, though. After a few months of getting settled into our new home, we made some great friendships that I believe will last forever. I never had a clue how important it was to have close friends until I had some that I wasn't related to. There's something very comforting about being chosen as a close friend.

If you don't have one or two people to whom you are not related to that you can be completely genuine and fun with, you've got to try it. Go out on a limb and let someone feel that special, chosen feeling, and you will get that in return. I have noticed that the older people get, the more they trick themselves into believing they are too busy for close friendships. Surface aquaintences are not enough; I am living on the greener side, and I've got to say - it's a pretty sweet place to be.

A Quiet Kind of Place

After all the busying about that was January and early February, things are beginning to calm down again. Dave's schedule has normalized somewhat and I have been able to spend some time unwinding at home. I've been trying to narrow my focus on the things I enjoy and the things that are important to me. I have always been the type of person who is anxious for the next thing in life, and I'm hopful that I'm learning to be content with my surroundings. So to help me do that, I am making more art than I've done in years, I'm turning down opportunities to do "stuff" (which is very unlike me), and I'm trying to be quiet. It's been quite nice to be able to sit - and to not think or act or move.

You should try it sometime.