This Looks Like Real Art!

I've said it before, many times, but I have the greatest friends.  Really.  If there were a competition, I'd win.  

One of my awesome friends is Lillian B.  You can check out her website here.  She took these pictures of my artwork, and I don't know about you...  but I think these are a little better than my camera phone pictures.

Thanks Lillian! 

 

Twenty Days

Just realized this morning that it's been twenty days since my last blog post. This past couple weeks has been busy, but don't I always say that? Am I the only one who is sick of me saying that? I mean, everyone is busy, right? The month of September was, by far, the busiest week I remember having at my office and trying to get done ELEVEN! projects is just not happening. Not to mention, I volunteered for three more projects. Ahem. I really am a smart person sometimes. Sometimes.

Luckily, I finally had time to get some artwork done this weekend for a silent auction I agreed to help out with. I have a new painted window to submit - along with lots of business cards sitting near, of course. This window is actually my favorite yet and I plan to do many more with the same idea carried through.

Since my digitial camera has been laid to rest, here are some camera phone pictures...I know. I know. Terrible. But, I really like the window, and I want to share! The title of this window is River Stones.

It's metallic paint!

A Restful Weekend

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First, a brief customer service announcement...all 3 of you who commented this weekend are going to be getting a prize. But, please forgive me if it's not immediate. It will come. Now, on to our regularly scheduled programming.

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What do you do when you have about eighty art and design projects going at once (none of which are income sources - I may add), 2 house guests, a dog-sitting arrangement, and a long holiday weekend? Well, I'm so glad you asked. You sit around the house in the midst of the chaos playing video games with your sister, you go to the drive-in theatre for the special holiday weekend triple feature, you have dinner out with friends...twice, and you refine your ignoring skills. (With the exception of feeding the dog of course.)

What do you do Tuesday morning when it hits you that you have done nothing? You panic. You look at facebook for a while, you check over your calendar, you get some good ideas for, you're not going to believe this, new projects to start and you panic.

I hope your weekend was as restful and as lovely as mine.

Too Much

I'm swamped. Seriously busy.

But I haven't forgot about the six of you who read the blog!

To reward you, I'm doing ANOTHER giveaway!!! But this one is a secret. I'm not advertising this giveaway anywhere but right here. So, if you want to win a special little prize just post a comment on this blog. Any ol' comment you want. I'll draw a random number Tuesday morning, at the end of the long weekend (Hooray hooray for holiday weekends) and you'll get your surprise in the mail shortly, or in person if you're here in Nashville.

Shh...don't tell!

Beautiful, Beautiful Words of Wisdom

I came across this list today from a woman named Regina Brett of The Plain Dealer, in Cleveland, Ohio. She just turned 90 years old, and the list below is from her. I can't stop reading it. I've made it all the way through a few times, and I can say with all certainty, I will keep it close to me.

"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most-requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:"

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
25. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ''In five years, will this matter?".
26. Always choose life.
27. Forgive everyone everything.
28. What other people think of you is none of your business.
29. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.
30. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
31. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
32. Believe in miracles.
33. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
34. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
35. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
36. Your children get only one childhood.
37. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
38. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
39. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
40. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
41. The best is yet to come.
42. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
43. Yield.
44. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.
45. Friends are the family that we choose for ourselves.

Fun with Clothes

I may have mentioned this before - I adore putting outfits together. It is the perfect quick creative outlet for me. Mixing colors, patterns, textures, and shapes...heavenly. I can't get enough. Here's some proof.

On a related note. I'm available for wardrobe styling for YOU! And if you'd like any details about the specific items used in these outfits, just let me know and I'll send it your way.

Vacation: days one - three

Four

Today marks the fourth year Dave and I have been married. We've known each other for seven; we dated for three. In these past 4 years, we've had a total of eleven jobs, lived in six homes, gone through seven vehicles, and managed to not only keep our sanity, but also to grow up together. I was 19, he was 20... we've done a lot of growing up. We have each changed by immeasurable amounts, but every change we make seems to mimic a change in the other and we have become immeasurably closer through it. We teach each other, have so much fun together, and learn how life works together. Life isn't perfect and marriage isn't perfect, but I think what we have is about as close as it can get.

David is one of those very rare men in the world who is genuinely a wonderful person. Godly, kind, honest, intelligent, compassionate, and giving. He has seen me at my absolute best, and he's helped me be better. He has seen me worse than I ever knew I could be, and he has loved me still. He's a wonderful, wonderful man - and it's my pleasure and my honor to be called his wife. Happy anniversary, David. I love you.

Depression

I gave myself a little pep talk before I started this blog. I told myself that I would always be honest – that I wouldn’t skirt issues that were affecting me, and so on. This is one of those times that I really don’t want to write honestly, but I’m going to out of a hope that it might help someone else.
I’m living with depression. It’s not a daily struggle, but it is a daily issue. I get in “funks” as Dave and I call them. A funk, for me, is categorized as a period of time – days, weeks, usually all winter, as well - where I don’t function like I feel I should. I usually can feel it creeping up on me. It can start with a little tiny thing pushing me in the direction of sadness, fatigue, or sometimes a complete lack of emotion. But it can also start for no reason. I can be sitting on the couch, watching TV, and feel it come barreling in. It also masquerades as several different things. Sometimes I look overly emotional – I will sob during movies that shouldn’t be so sad or cry during a conversation that shouldn’t warrant tears, often it looks like laziness – I could go days doing nothing but sitting in the house in the dark or sleep 12-15 hours a night several days in a row. Sometimes it feels like deep loneliness, even when I’m surrounded by friends. Sometimes it looks completely normal. My life makes sense, and my emotions make sense. Other times it looks normal, but it doesn’t feel normal. Lots of people are depressed. Most people who live with it don’t understand it, and the people around them definitely don’t understand it either. If you’re someone who is very close to someone with depression, please understand that you can’t fix it. Sometimes even trying to fix it is worse than just letting it happen. Show love and support. Listen. Watch for warning signs of serious mental illness or suicide attempts. But you’re never going to fully understand it, and you’re not going to be able to fix it.
If you are not someone going through depression, I want to use this post as a window of sorts into the feelings. The past few days for me are an example of how my depression works. Last week was a great week. I was feeling up and alive and motivated. All weekend I had a great time being around close friends. Sunday afternoon I went to a party with a group of wonderful friends from church. We talked and laughed and ate some amazing lasagna.
And then Sunday night, I was laughing with Dave, we were having a fun time just hanging out together. Right before we fell asleep I said to him, “I don’t really want to talk about it, but today was hard for me.” He said, “I thought it may have been,” which is proof that I can’t hide my sadness like I generally think I can. And we went to bed.
Yesterday, I couldn’t focus on work, I was irritable, and I was very tired. Last night I had a dream that I was pregnant (which, if you know me at all, you know this is a serious desire for me) and woke up to realize that it was only a dream and became very emotional, I couldn’t sleep well at all, constantly waking up and feeling sad as I tried to fall back asleep and getting annoyed with myself that I was sad in the middle of the night, which meant I was wide awake… filled with emotion that had no cause, and spiraling deeper into the emotion.
When my alarm finally went off this morning, I struggled with whether or not I was going to go to work. I didn’t want to face normal life, normal people, outside situations. I had enough going on with myself, and bringing other people into it was not something I thought I could handle. I finally did get out of bed and got ready because I knew that if I called into work I would have to tell them why I wasn’t coming into work, and that would bring people into my mess even more – which I really didn’t want. Since “getting ready for work” was just an automatic response that I had to put little to no effort into today, I had about 15 minutes to kill before I left for work. I lay back in bed, with Dave still asleep, and cried. For no reason. I was just sad. Sad that I had to go to work, sad about not being pregnant, worried that maybe I could never have children, worried that I was holding on to something so totally out of my control, sad that I didn’t have breakfast, and sad that I was sad. I cried on my way to work, I cried at my desk, I ignored phone calls, I avoided chit-chat.
Although this isn’t a complete picture of what depression can be, it’s a glimpse. I’m not posting this so people will feel sorry for me, or so I can get away with certain emotions. I really do want this to help people in some way, and I want to be honest. If you have any questions about depression, feel free to ask me – but I can’t guarantee I’ll have any answers.

25 Things That Make Me Smile - the sequal

In January, I had a post about things I was loving at the moment, titled 25 Things That Make Me Smile. Since being more grateful is something I think we should all strive towards...I've decided to make my 25 things list bi-annual. So, without further ado, here ya go.

• The way fingers smell when they're finished peeling an orange
• Seeing wind - in pine trees and in big puddles
• "Going shopping" without spending the money. via Polyvore
• The mood and energy burst I get every spring
• Shoes...oh, shoes
• Sticking to a budget. It sounds crazy, I know - but it feels so good
• Rice and beans, which coinsidentally helps out with the previous bullet point
• My new food processor
• Having wonderful co-workers
• Finally figuring out Twitter (you can follow me @stephaniehagen)
• Selling my first painting to NEW YORK CITY!
• A husband who is fun. Really, fun is a big deal.
• The new album, "Old Time Speaker" by Bronze Radio Return "Digital Love" is great
• The fact that my giant bean-bag fits perfectly in the bed of our truck. Perfect Drive-in theater experience
• The wholly perfect, purposeful plan of God
• Seeing an idea I had being carried out by others successfully, gives me hope for my own idea
• All my dear, dear friends who are pregnant with healthy babies (currently, 9 friends are carrying, and one is carrying twins. Ridiculous, no?)
• Trying my hand at writing lyrics. It's a whole other animal than writing poetry
• Homemade guacamole. Can't get enough. Although, avocados are $1.08 a piece. That does not make me smile
• Living in a super-friendly neighborhood sandwiched by two amazing families
• Slow months at work (thank heavens for slow phone days)
• Anything feminine in fashion - bows, ribbon, pleating, florals. - I'm hooked on cutesy
• Hillsboro Village in Nashville. It's a magical place
• Planning my first monthly craft night. I'm thinking of calling it "crafternoon delight"
• People who comment on my blog and list a few of the things that are making them smile today :)

Smile, friends. Life is better when we're adding to the beauty.

A little of this...a little of that

Today, I have a hodge-podge of things I want to share. Please just appease me in my randomness.


The first thing is health related - (and it's the last health thing for a while, I promise). And it's also good news! I got some blood work back this week from my doctor's office. It was another cholesterol check, and the results were good. Not great, but good. For those of you, like myself before February of 2008, who know nothing about cholesterol - I will put it this way... desirable cholesterol levels are 200 and lower. From "desirable" to "very high" is only 40 points. My cholesterol level was 304 - which is 104 points above desirable (if just 40 points difference is good to bad, then think what 104 points difference is!). Yikes, right? Well, I have gone from 304 down to 221! It took me about a year and a half, not bad. I'm still in the "borderline high" category, but I'm at least low enough now that I don't have to go on medication, which is great news.



The second tidbit is also exciting, though a bit vague. Today I have an opportunity that may flourish into something fun for me. I've been talking with a woman from church about the possibility of becoming the nanny for her little one that's due in December. The details are still not hashed out yet, and it may not work out in the long run. But I am indeed excited about the possibility. For those of you out there who are the praying type - please send one up for me. I've been doing a lot of it in the past few months, and, well, I'm just very hopeful.



And to keep with the theme of random objects with no relation - here is a picture from my current favorite website to brighten your day.

Another recipe

Yes. I know. I am obsessed with food lately. Eating healthier is something that I put all of my energy into for a while, until it becomes normal to me, or it slowly tapers off into eating old junk food again. Since I am still in the all-I-can-think-about-is-eating-healthy-food stage, I am going to post another recipe today. I made a comment about this recipe on facebook, and have had several people ask me for the recipe, so I thought I should probably post it for all to see. It's simple, it's delicious, and it's quite healthy!

Cucumber Crab Salad

1 lb lump crab meat (I used imitation since it's so much cheaper, but it would be amazing with real crab)
1 cup of plain yogurt
2 tbsp olive oil (I just eyeballed it)
1/2 cucumber chopped
1 garlic clove minced
1 tsp dill (I would use a little less next time, just because the longer it sat, the stronger the dill became)
1 tsp mint
1 scallion
1 lime (zest and juice)

It's great on whole wheat toast, or in a wrap.

What I Need to Hear

This may not be just exactly what someone else needs right now. So, this may be a pretty selfish post - but It's exactly what I need. I have my eye on a couple of things lately that I know may not work out...things that I really desire to be involved in, and things I feel would make me feel purposeful, needed, and significant. I have no burning bush right now telling me which steps to take, but in the wandering of my gypsy soul, this is what I need.

Romans 12:12
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

Ephesians 6:18
And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.

Psalm 126:5-6
Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy. He who goes out weeping, carrying seed to sow, will return with songs of joy, carrying sheaves with him.

Eph. 3:20-21
Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, unto him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus unto all generations for ever and ever.

Dear Dieting,

You know, as well as I, that our relationship is strained. You are constantly there for me - always ready to take me back when I have failed you. For that, I am thankful. I have cursed you behind your back, cheated on you, and openly denied your existance. For that, I apologize. I do want you to know, though, that I'm really trying this time. Dr. Pepper walked in front of me today in the break room, and I totally ignored him - right to his face. Because, though I can't say I'm in love with you, I do love the idea that you can change my life. So, dieting, why don't you come over here and rock my world.

Sincerely,
Stephanie

A New Leaf

Today is the last day of June, so what better to talk about than the past and the future? Does that make sense to anyone but me? Well, either way - tomorrow is a big day for me.

Tomorrow I begin a new diet/exercise/Bible study plan. After my little Emergency Room scare last week, I have decided that I need to stop being so lackadaisical about my health, and I'm attacking it from a few directions.

First - Bible study - I'm going to kick my self in the spiritual butt. Although my relationship with God is always changing, I'm going to do what I can to keep growing. So I'm going to start reading the Bible more, and I'm excited to get going. Not quite sure where I'm going to begin yet though. Recommendations are welcome!

Secondly, food. Oh, how I love good food. This means a lot of different things for me. Sometimes it means I love roasted vegetables and a fish fillet. Other times it means I love cheeseburgers and fried mushrooms. Not always great choices...BUT, tomorrow I will start making wise food decisions and not just tasty food decisions. A good friend who is very health-informed is going to help me talk through some of this and help me figure out what I need to eat to lower my cholesterol (which, at a high, was a whopping 304! - if you don't know what that means, check out this fact sheet) and get into great shape.

And speaking of great shape - here comes the exercise. I am the type of person who despises exercise. I'd rather curl up on the couch with an old movie or ride around in a car (that has air conditioning, of course). I'm just not big on strenous activity. Hence my ridiculous state of health currently. So, that's on my list of things to change. I'm starting off slowly because I'm just flat-out out of shape.

Today is the last day of my unhealthyness! I'll try to keep you posted on the journey. And hopefully I'll be able to have some before and after pics.

Fiesta

In the 4 years that Dave and I have been married, we've gone the last two and a half without a kitchen table. We do a lot of coffee table dinners. When we went home for vacation last month, we were able to pick up our table and bring it to the new house! I was thrilled, and decided to celebrate with a big Mexican fiesta - all homemade!

The menu:

Fish Tacos

Guacamole

Mango Salsa

Cilantro Lime Rice

and a Key-Limeish dessert thing (only kind of homemade, because I improvised with the recipe on the box)

Here's the recipe for my guacamole:

3 avocados

1 tbsp of minced garlic (I love garlic, so I use quite a bit)

about 2 tsp of cilantro (this is for dried, use less if your cilantro is fresh)

about a tsp each of garlic salt and onion powder

salt and pepper to taste

a sprinkle of cayenne pepper

zest and juice of one lime

Mix it all up and enjoy! You can also add chopped tomatoes and onions, if you like that kind of thing - but I prefer it without.

Twenty-three, so far

Monday, I turned 23.  Since Monday morning, I've done the following:

• been to the chiropractor - about whose unfathomable power I am waning in passion, I must add
• had a very, very wonderful birthday party with some very, very wonderful friends
• lost power at my house, during said birthday party, for about 2 hours
• been to Louisville and back for a convention through work
• had a false alarm heart attack, as I've been calling it
• and a subsequent trip to the Emergency Room to get an EKG, a chest x-ray, a sonogram to check for gall stones, and ended up with a non-diagnosis          
  
• researched esophageal spasms (which the ER thinks is the likely cause of my chest pain), gastroesophageal reflux disorder, acid reflux disorder, panic attacks, panic disorder, and depression
• called my family practice doctor to schedule a hopefully-more-productive-than-the-ER appointment
• bought a food processor with birthday money
• had an emotional breakdown
• got over it
• broke the A/C in my car
• ate 3 cups of jello and 3 slices of key lime pie (don't judge me... it was a false alarm heart attack)
• took a five and a half hour nap
• blogged

what have you done in the past 4 days?

Texture, Patterns, and Color

I don't have anything insightful to say today. The wind and storms have just kicked in around downtown Nashville, so the sky is dark and things are pretty quiet. It's just a normal day at work - my stack of things to do is pretty minimal, I can hear the chatter of those who cannot live without speaker phone, the elevator dinging every 2 minutes, and the squeak of too old office chairs. So, what am I doing with my time? Besides taking the phone calls coming in and out - I am making outfits based on room decor. "What?", you may ask. Well...here is an example.

This room is from the Design*Sponge website. So moody, so feminine, so sleek. Anyway...after cleaning up my drool, I made an outfit on Polyvore to mimic the fun vibe from the room. The gorgeous light fixture above the window bench inspired the necklace, the dark gray-teal of the walls inspired the shoes, etc. If you've ever seen the show "Dress My Nest" on the style network, it's kind of the same thing - but backwards. I think I have many more of these up my sleeve. But maybe not on days that I'm supposed to be working.

Vacation!

We are officially back from our summer vacation/family reunion. It was a wonderful time. Really - really wonderful. Dave's brother and his family have been in the Philippines for nearly 4 years, and they were able to come back home for a while. It was so great to catch up with all of them, and see all of our neices and nephews together for the first time.

We were sad to leave the family again, but we hope to see them several more times before they head back overseas next January. Here are a few pictures from vacation.

This picture of Dave and me was taken at a water show in Branson, MO...which is just really amazing fountains with lights and fire and stuff. Pretty neat, I thought.

The resort where we stayed had some really amazing outdoor activities. Paddle boating was definitely something the kiddos wanted to try.

This is the whole Hagen gang.

It was so great to get to see our neices and nephews again. Starting on the top left and going clockwise, these cuties are Zach, Mikayla, Ben (all three Dave's brother's kids), Sydney, and Abby (Dave's sister's girls).

The resort was beautiful. Lots of beautiful landscaping.

This was our last day at the resort. We had a blast with the Hagens.

Shameless

I have briefly blogged about my new craft room in the house we just moved into. It is a wonderful place filled with cubbies and sorting tins and the cutest little push pins. Do you know what it's missing? This craft table.

I firmly believe that buying this table for my craft area would be a waste of money. But, I also firmly believe that if i won this table, my room would be a magical place. If you feel the same way, pretty please vote for my window at this link. http://theoriginalscrapbox.com/craftbox_giveaway/showContestant.php?id=342 Shameless, yes, desperate, yes, but just look at that table! Sigh.