Grasshopper

My dad always says, "patience, young grasshopper." It must be one of his catch phrases because he's always saying it to me. Either that, or it just happens to be applicable to 1/4 of the conversations I start with him.

My whole life, my dad was a youth minister. Which meant when I was about 3 through the end of the 6th grade, I wanted to hang out with the kids in the youth group. I wanted to carry my caboodle around to retreats, hairspray myself to toxic levels, and go to prom. In 7th grade, I wanted to go to college and get married. In high school I really wanted to go to college and get married.

In college I got married. So then I had to want something else, naturally. So about 2o seconds after we moved into our first rental house, I decided I wanted to have kids. Granted I was newly 19 and everyone thought I was crazy enough to get married that young - having kids would seem a little desperate. And heaven forbid I seem desperate.

Soon we moved to big ol' Music City where I got to concentrate on what I wanted for Dave. I wanted him to find a great internship, I wanted him to make great connections, I wanted him to become the youngest producer in history to win a Dove, a Grammy, a big house with a room full of swings and pillows, ownership of the music industry, miniature horses... and of course he'd have a great sense of humility through it all. That, surprisingly, didn't happen right away. We're 3 years in, which I know isn't much - especially for the music business, and I still have so many wants through the whole thing.

And then one day last week I was sitting here thinking about that and wanting kids and wanting stability and wanting an ice cream sandwich and THIS little nugget popped into my head, "The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want." And then it kept repeating. Over and over. And I didn't want it to - I wanted to kind of ignore it. Put it back in its "things I heard 20 years ago and can now skip over" box. I sat at my desk and answered phone calls and it just kept repeating. I shall not want, I shall not want, STEPH - YOU shall not want.

So I pulled up a link to Psalm 23 on the computer and started writing it down.
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

God just said, "patience young grasshopper" to me. I didn't even know he liked Karate Kid.